10 Ways to Believe in Yourself

Hello beauties,

So 2019 is well under way and between me and you, I have a strong feeling that this year is going to be a pretty amazing one for all of us.

When we talk about New Year's resolutions, we are primarily referring to physical lifestyle changes. These often include going to the gym, eating more healthily and embarking on an Instagram-inspired trend such as Veganuary. While leading an active and healthier lifestyle is positive, I think some people are missing the point. A New Year's resolution should be an ongoing goal. However for most, these lifestyle changes are stuck to resolutely during the month of January and then by February 1st, they are flung straight out the window.

In my opinion, what we should be working towards is feeling good about ourselves and embracing who we are. We should be striving  to create positive changes in not only our outlooks, but also the world around us.

Today's post is all about the power of self-belief. There are times when I feel as though I'm being hit from two sides with people underestimating me because I am both female and disabled. Being susceptible to double discrimination, I have to work twice even three times as hard to be accepted. Growing up, I've noticed in myself how people's preconceptions can really take their toll on your mental health and confidence. But being a driven person, I've never let it stop me or get in my way. Instead it has only motivated me to prove them wrong and be the most successful person I can possibly be.

I want to tell you all that you should always aim high, dream big and never quit on your ambition. I want to show you that you can achieve anything and everything you put your mind too. So without further ado, here are my top ten tips to get you believing in yourself.

1. Make a list of all your past accomplishments.

Before we establish what you are going to achieve, it is important to reflect upon all the things you have excelled at during your life and what you are most proud of. These achievements don't have to be directly related to your future ambitions; they just need to be situations where you showed determination.

After completing your list, try to identify the skills you either used or gained for each achievement. Make a second column and write down these skills.

If you're having a bad day and the self-doubt starts creeping in, these two lists are going to be your main port of call for inspiration and confidence. Serving as a manifestation of your awesomeness, they are there to reinforce your strengths, talents and capabilities whilst also giving those pesky insecurities a kicking.

2. Identify your ultimate ambition.

Granted, you may have a ton of dreams you wish to make a reality, such as meeting your favourite celeb (in my case Shawn Mendes) or owning a Chanel 2.55. And that's brilliant. But at the end of the day, you have to ask yourself a question: what is the most important goal I would like to reach in my life?

Come up with one to three at the very most and write these down in a separate list. Contemplate what your heart truly desires. This is your future and you can do anything you want to do. Therefore, while advice is extremely valuable, don't let yourself be led by others down a path you do not wish to pursue.

Here are my three main ambitions:

• To be a journalist writing for a major publication

• To empower women and girls through my writing

• To work in New York City

Having a clear objective is your key to being successful. It puts everything into focus and provides you with a strong sense of resolve. Particularly on those days where all you want to do is hibernate, these aspirations will get you out of bed and galvanise you to take action.

3. Break ambitions down into bite-size chunks.

Ok, so you know where your end destination lies. But how do you intend to get there?

Say for example, you are catching the train to a place you've never visited before. You wouldn't just jump on the first train that pulls into the platform and hope that it stops off at your destination. Instead, you would plan ahead, checking train times, where it stops etc.

For your future, it's a similar principle. You're going to have to map out your journey, research your area, establish whether there are qualifications you require or certain steps you need to take. Especially if your future goal is a long way off, it's important to consider the amount of time, work and persistence that you will have to maintain.

Breaking ambitions down into smaller milestones will help you stay on track and keep you motivated. As a guide, use the following structure.

Where do I want to be in:

• One year

• Three years

• Five years

• Ten years

4. Dream big but with realistic expectations.

I am a strong believer of the notion that we should always aim high.

On many occasions in my life, people have been sceptical about my potential and some have even suggested I aim lower due to my disability. I've been told that it's unlikely I will get a job for a major publication since they are very competitive. Additionally, people have asked me 'why do you want to work in a different country when you're blind because surely that's just making life harder for yourself?'. Every single time, I have looked them in the eye and said 'no, this is my dream and I am going to achieve it'.

There is a difference between being constructive and downright condescending. If a person straight up tells you that you cannot achieve your goal, then please, please, please do not listen to them. I don't care if that dream crusher's job title is a career's advisor: the fact of the matter is they are talking absolute trash. You are the only person who knows your full potential. And as long as you keep going and keep believing in yourself, then I can guarantee you will get there eventually.

What you have to do though is be open-minded. Say you wanted to run a marathon, having never so much as jogged in your life. You wouldn't just wake up one day and go run a casual 40k because let's be honest you would probably die. Conversely, you would endure months of training, gradually building the distance up and up until you reached the required level of fitness. With your career and other goals, it works the same. Be aware that things don't happen overnight. And if they do, it's incredibly rare.

5. Reward yourself when you reach a milestone.

However major or minor, it is vital that you pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself on your achievements. To celebrate, do the things that make you feel awesome, whether that be going out for cocktails with friends and family; treating yourself to something new; or ordering in a takeaway and catching up on your favourite shows.

6. Measure your progress.

It's important that you can acknowledge how much you've improved overtime as it will help to build your confidence no end. Personally, I've kept every last one of my articles and pieces of writing. Often, I will look back at them and although many of the old pieces make me cringe, I'm able to see how much my writing style has improved which is so positive.

7. Let failure be a lesson, not a setback.

Nobody likes the feeling of failure. When you've put your heart and soul into something and it doesn't pay off, it can feel soul-destroying. And that's normal. But what counts is how you take that failure, how you overcome it and how you move forward towards your goal. Look at it this way: if you made a mistake, at least now you can see where you went wrong. If possible, try to obtain feedback and constructive criticism which will help you establish your weaknesses and how to work on them. If you can go away, take on board that feedback and learn from it, you will come back stronger than ever.

Every person who is successful has failed at something in their lives. For example, JK Rowling, one of the most legendary writers of all time, encountered a number of rejections from publishers before she hit it big. But if she had let those rejections stop her, if she had given up there and then, she would not be where she is today. Plus, we would be living in a world where Harry Potter did not exist which would be the most depressing thing ever.

8. Talk to the people who you love.

If you're seeking reassurance and honesty, then go to the people who you trust the most. They know you better than anybody else and  only want the best for you. Therefore, you can be satisfied that their opinion will be genuine. Whereas, if you go to someone who doesn't know you that well, they are more likely to give a noncommittal or inaccurate response.

9. Don't be afraid to take risks.

Staying in your comfort zone may feel like the idyllic place, but it's really not. You have the potential to do incredible things. However, sitting around and waiting is not going to make the puzzle pieces fall into place. If you want to be successful, you have to put yourself out there and give it everything you've got. What's the worst that could happen? Either you get a rejection which you'll learn from. Or, that risk turns out to be the best decision you've ever made.

At the end of the day, you just don't know which way it will go. But it's a thousand times better to try than not do anything.

10. Own It

Never downplay your successes. Be proud of your accomplishments and don't be afraid to tell people what you're good at.

Sometimes I feel as though our society is built upon a myriad of mixed messages. On the one hand, we are told from a young age that we should be proud of our achievements and strengths. However on the other hand, when we openly express that self-love or pride, there are people out there who will raise their eyebrows and assume we must be narcissistic. I honestly find it ridiculous. We shouldn't be encouraging girls to be modest and demure. We should be empowering them to be strong, independent and ambitious.

Before I leave you, I have one more thing to say. Anything is possible with a little bit of self-belief. Keep going even when the going gets tough, because you will without a shadow of a doubt achieve your dreams.